The sale junk food at Albertson's this week included the little individual Dove chocolates. They have fortune-style statements printed inside the wrappers. Somehow, they're even funnier when read fortune-cookie style (tagging them with "...in bed")
"If they can do it, you know you can..."
"Be mischievous. It feels good..."
"You know what? You look good in red..."
"Learn something from everyone you meet..."