November 20th, 2009

Enterprise Bridge

Such a busy day...

One, a San Pasqual freshman was stabbed in Kit Carson Park just across the street from the school yesterday, in broad daylight. I'd say times are tough when landscapers are sticking up kids, but apparently it wasn't a robbery.

The administration at Stevenson HS was feeling unappreciated, and decided Chicagoland needed a reminder of what a bunch of uptight douchebags they are. So they spiked the student newspaper again over articles that shatter the myth that Stevenson students are all wonderful virtuous angels. God forbid that people should be aware that some of their teenage snowflakes shoplift, smoke, drink, fuck, and elect not to have abortions! This comes eight months after they spiked an issue about students casually fucking.

As an honorably discharged student of neighboring District 225, I can say with confidence that a few of my fellow honor students shoplifted and/or smoked, many drank, most fucked, and from all that, I only heard of one of my classmates getting his girlfriend pregnant. Nobody was shot, stabbed, beaten with 2x4s, or thrown from a moving car. All in all, exactly what you'd expect from an affluent suburb. And in nearly 20 years since, ain't nothing changed.

Also, when a 10-year old in Arkansas decided to quietly stand up (or rather, sit down) in support of an oppressed minority, Jon Stewart did the right thing and called in the cavalry to defend the boy against his homophobic peers. That's right, Mick Foley will bring the pain down upon all who would call Will Phillips a gaywad. (It is unknown what role the Gaywad-Dorkwad alliance may play in support.)

(It's a damn good thing they didn't cross Shane Botwin, as fruit punch left elementary school, went to summer school, then graduated to actually capping motherfuckers.)

[Edit] And a great piece on what he could've said instead :-)